ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize
