so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize