drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
