I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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