If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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