i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
