Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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