some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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