tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Randomize
