just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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