Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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