a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Randomize