Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
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I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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