I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
