I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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