Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
