Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
