I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Randomize
