You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I FOUND THE LEGS
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
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