susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
