And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize