You work out of a Hotel?
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
