He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
