i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Randomize
