I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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