i always forget guys have bellybuttons
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?