and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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