i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
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