Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Randomize
