I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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