what day is it and did you see me today?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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