what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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