so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
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