she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize