just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
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WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
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Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
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