I think my fart just growled at me.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
