Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Randomize