I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize