Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Randomize
