i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
