he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Randomize
