Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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