Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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