Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
