i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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