I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
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