so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
