And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Randomize
