this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Randomize
