I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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