yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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